Just Too Cool

My Dear Jackson....

You are growing up so quickly.

You are still loving and sweet but the time has come where you are too cool for us all. Sometimes.

So, EVERY day you ask if you can go play with the kids down the street.

And most days, I try to avoid it by having anyone come over here.

The thought of you going to play without me being right there has been a HUGE fear of mine.

So, I started today with some rules:

1-Watch for cars

2-Stay out of road

3-Do NOT go into anyone's house.

4-You must be able to hear me call your name

So, you went to play and I sat inside and worried.

Then, I walked outside and paced and watched from a distance.

I called you home a few times to check in with you.

You seemed to be doing well.

And after I said "Time for Dinner," you came home with your head held high.

I was impressed with your confidence.

Until you dissolved into sobs.

"The... older... boys... wouldn't... let... me... play."

And my heart broke for you as I held you.

"They...said..I...wasn't...old...enough."

The sobs continued.

And I held my oldest baby and felt so sad.

{There are kids his age over there too but he just wanted to play baseball with the older boys.}

We ate dinner and I tried to explain that sometimes bigger boys only want to play sports with each other.

As soon as dinner was over, you jumped up and said:

"Can I go outside and play now?"

I guess you got over that quickly!

Don't grow up too fast Jackson! I still need you to need me.

I love you!

~Mom